Fear of rejection

◦ First off I say what I say not because I’m better than you but just sharing the love. Hoping that somehow, somewhere someone will benefit from what I share.

◦ Continuing from my blog about fear…We try to fulfil our lives with temporary fixes like a half hearted date or a flirt. Pointedly, the notion that worldly materials can fulfil our lives or make us lives rosy or better is consistent and quite wrong. That’s living in cloud cuckoo land or living a fantasy. Things like impulsive shopping – buying things that you don’t really need; hoading, going on endless dates with multiple partners. Wanting more and more telling yourself if I only get this and that or this one and that one I will be ok. When you fall into this trap you would have lost a control in you. Once you get that you might find yourself wanting more of that and before you know it’s an addiction. We all live on a grid and we have a pattern to follow it runs on imperative biological. mechanisms. Like food, sex and that ond if those bit’s becomes uncontrollable to the point of causing distraction, pose and reflect behind our damaged perceptions there is a great fear that pertains to a core belief, this is the key line in a code of our misery, if we crack the code and address it we can be free from the bondage of fear.

Fear of rejection by women

For instance behind the fact that I’m still single there is a fear of rejection to some extent, the fear that the people I’m attracted to would never love me because I’m disabled, the fear of being heartbroken, the fear of inadequacy, fear of taking risks and that. 5:

◦ She is not attracted to me, so what? Fair play, that’s her opinion and wish her the best in finding mr Fantastic. I will get my heart broken, so what? It can be put together- give it time to heal and move on. I sustained a brain injury, so what? Difference is what make this world. I’m not adequate- man’s disabled, so what? This kind of defective thinking is sad or worse. To address inadequacy I tried to climb the ladder, thinking that if I achieve x,y,z I will be ok but after achieving that I found myself still climbing the ladder. However ain’t nothing wrong with climbing rather than being stuck in the swamp and hopefully one day you will settle at the beach (the swamp symbolises despair, Climbing is building your carrier, and when you settle at the beach is when you finally relax and enjoy the fruits of your labour).

◦ I’m no stranger to taking risks and I know the importance of going an extra mile. I know that if you take deeper risks you get deeper rewards and that if you go an extra mile there is less traffic. However because of fear of rejection I don’t take deeper risks and I’m reluctant to go an extra mile to ask out who I want. To be continued…

Fear

Fear

Fear can be a beautiful thing for instant throughout my life I used the fear of failure to drive me to work hard to obtain desirable results. I call it edifying fear similarly Devine fear compels the saints to take righteous actions.

If viewed otherwise fear it is deleterious. If you want to be at the helm of your life you ought to change how you respond to fear. Silence fear in order to take control of your life and win the mental game.

⁃ change how you think have a growth mindset, self compassionate and focusing on positives not constant self deprecation. For instant tell yourself that no one is perfect (however aspire to be perfect), or I will try my best, or I’m going to do it for me. It’s more motivating to change if you have self self compasión for yourself, if things go not according to plan ask, what happened? Not what’s wrong with me?

⁃ over thinking things causes indecisiveness, overthinking is a restraint triggered by fear, the fear of failure, embarrassment, letting other people down, rejection and so on or anything that’s hard is going to trigger fear. self doubt plagues your thoughts and Overthinking things gives you a false perception of control in your life yet by taking action is the principal strategy of taking control of your life. Insidiously overthinking is the easiest and safest option to take. Action is physical commitment to something it’s movement and the only way to get to somewhere or achieve something is by taking action and owning it. When you own your story you it allows you to tell it in the way that empowers you. When you own your story you take away from other people and give yourself control. If you don’t take action the end result is the preoccupation by an obstacle than seeing the opportunity, some opportunities come once in a lifetime remember that so don’t miss your chance to blow as Eminem sings in Lose yourself. Don’t let fear stop you from becoming what you were born to be, be whatever you set out to be. Worrying too much causes you to miss out on so many opportunities in life, start now and get perfect later but perfection is elusive. When you worrying you are thinking about something which could go wrong in future and thwarting the present progress. Have a growth mindset. However it’s ok to experience fear but not to live in fear. With faith you have the guts over fear. To be continued